9 months of cold weather. Enough!! I hope MOther Nature reads this and realizes its time for sunshine and warmth. This is the last weekend in May- Memorial day weekend- the weekend we have BBQs and welcome summer. Well, this year it wasn't so warm nor was it welcoming. It snowed in Connecticut. Well thats a change for Ohio. We didn't have any snow. Maybe thats a silver lining for us.

The definition of Marriage:

MARRIAGE, n.

[1] the dawn of romance and the commencement of history;

[2] a word that should be pronounced as "mirage";

[3] an event, for the upper middle class, is the only adventure left;

[4] a very good way to promote civilization - if you get a good wife you will be happy, if you get a bad one you will become a philosopher {Socrates};

[5] a process much like a cafeteria - you carefully look over the choices, select what looksthe best - and pay later;

[6] an event which is called "tying the knot" - unfortunately, the knot can be a noose;

[7] a word which always means commitment - but so does insanity;

[8] a ceremony favored in England - it's the only way to beat their cold winters and lack of centralheating;

[9] something that changes the demeanor of a driver - there is no longer any effort needed to keep both hands on the wheel;

[10] the only permanent cure for love;

[11] is only compatible when the man makes a living and his wife makes living worthwhile;

[12] the only adventure open to the cowardly;

[13] something which is called a feast - unfortunately, sometimes the appetizer is better than the main course;

[14] a group which consists of: a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two;

[15] the alliance of two people, one who never remembers birthdays, and the other who never forgets them;

[16] the process that turns a female from an attraction into a distraction;

[17] a legal custom which turns a man into the captive audience of his wife;

[18] that ceremony which makes more strange bedfellows than politics;

[19] a rite where two people, under the influence most violent, most insane, most delusive, and mosttransient of passions, are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal and exhausting condition until death do them part;

[20] occurs where a man gets hooked by his own line;

[21] in America, is the only legal method of suppressing freedom of speech;

[22] is made out of two toothbrushes but a single tube of toothpaste;

[23] is just a three-ring circus: engagement, wedding, and suffer;

[24] the process of finding out the kind of guy your wife would have preferred;

[25] a condition where no wife gets what she expected, and no husband expected what he was getting;

[26] the ceremony which provides a man with something that, sooner or later, he will find he can't blame on the government;

[27] a tradition which would suffer considerably if men had to pay the minister the same fee they will eventually have to pay the divorce lawyer;

[28] is much like a pair of shears, so joined so the parts cannot be separated, often moving in opposite directions, yet always punishing anyone who tries to come between them;

[29] the continuous process of getting used to things you never expected;

[30] a status which depends upon two to be successful but only one to turn into a failure;

[31] is a book in which the first chapter is written in poetry and the rest of the pages is prose;

[32] a bargain, and a sensible person understands that someone must get the better of any bargain;

[33] in Japanese is called "Judo" - the art of conquering by yielding. This is the western equivalent of "Yes, dear";

[34] a confrontation which always demands the greatest understanding of the subtle art of insincerity possible between two human beings;

[35] is not a word, but a sentence;

[36] a delightful form of combat where you get to sleep with the enemy;

[37] an investment that pays big dividends if you manage to keep up the interest.

OOPS.......


Cover letter: "I would be prepared to meet with you at your earliest convenience to discuss what I can do to your company."

*That's what we're afraid of.

Resume: "It is my professional objective to obtain a position which allows me to make use of my commuter skills."

*I think we can oblige.

Weaknesses: "Suffer from prickly heat in summer."

*Sounds uncomfortable

Cover letter: "Enclosed is my resume for your viewing pleasure."

*We can hardly wait.

Cover letter: "You are privileged to receive my resume."

*We'll try not to let it go to our heads.

Objective: "To mature in the field of human behavior."

*Good luck with that.

Experience: "10 years of experience in financail budgiting and transactions rigistering."

*But limited experience with the spell-check function.

Cover letter: "Please overlook my resume."

*If you insist.

Cover letter: "I'm submitting the attached copy of my resume for your consumption."

*Yum.

Skills: "Grate communication skills."

*Yes, but can you talk and chop at the same time?

Experience: "Responsibilities included recruiting, screening, interviewing and executing final candidates."

*Seems kind of harsh

Cover letter: "Salary demanded - Rs 2 lakhs per month."

*Would you like that in 50s or 100s?

Strengths: "Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer."

*Would that be Mozart or Beethoven?

Education: "B.A. in Loberal Arts."

*Did you minor in ear piercing?

Cover letter: "I've updated my resume so it's more appalling to employers."

*We're pretty shocked already ...

Cover letter: "Seek challenges that test my mind and body, since the two are usually inseparable."

*Glad to hear it.

Cover letter: "My intensity and focus are at inordinately high levels, and my ability to complete projects on time is unspeakable."

*At these extremes, some things are best left unsaid.

Cover letter: "Experienced in all faucets of accounting."

*That should help with the flow of information.

My cousin Jacob, read my blog the other day and felt that incest was a weird topic of discussion because normal people would not think about discussing it. Honestly, in my field, it is probably one of the most normal topics to discuss. Infact, sometimes it is not the worst thing that has happened to some of the children I have worked with. But it is a taboo topic. Alot of people feel that these are things that should not be talked about. During my training as a therapist, I was taught that sometimes topics like sex, suicide and race need to be spoken about. It doesn't mean that talking about suicide will make your client think about doing it but it does let them know that they are in safe zone and they have an ally to talk to. It lays the foundation and establishes a stronger rapport with the client

Where is summer? It is almost the end of May and it is still cold.......... We had to turn the heater back on a couple of days ago. Apparently the weather this year is going to be really messed up. It is going to get very hot all of a sudden and just as quickly it is going to get cold all over again in time for winter. Really!!!??

It is always good to show your resume to someone else to get a second opinion or to make sure that there aren't any mistakes which you may have missed while looking it over. Well.... the only problem with that is that everyone has another opinion or a narrow view especially if one particular format which may or may not have worked for them. If you try to focus on skills there will definitely be someone who will say that employment or education is more important. If you use a functional format someone will definitely tell you to change the whole thing because chronological is better. By the end of it, rather than feeling a sense of clarity or relief, you feel worse because you are back at square one. At the end of the day you have to do what works for you- what you feel comfortable with. However, unless those calls start coming in........ comfort is the last thing any job hunter feels.

I am obsessed with my job search.... who would have thunk it??!! Anyway its 4:30am and I have been doing research for the best job hunting advice, dos and don'ts, tranferable skills etc etc etc. Most of the articles I have read recommend that the first thing most graduating students should do is make use of on- campus resources like the career center. I don't think any of the authors of these articles have ever been to the University of Akron's Career Management Center. Despite the warnings of several well- wishing friends, I made an appointment to meet with a counselor there. What did I have to lose? NOthing........ But I didn't gain anything either. Here is what I learnt:
1. The counselors at the CMC are ignorant with regard to the issues international students face. Rather ridiculous considering that nearly 70% of the student body is international.
2. They think that they are helping by just telling us how not to write a resume and sending us on our merry way.
3. They do not provide us with any networking opportunities.
4. For some reason they still have jobs!!!!!

What happened to the days when you had to be honest on your resume? We were told that if you are not honest on your resume you will get caught in a lie when your prospective employer interviews. Well, guess what!!! The rules of employment have changed. Your resume is now best made up with little twisted statements. Twisted because the statements aren't really lies- they are just worded in a different way. SO basically they are designed to meet the needs of the employer. Give them what they are looking for. Here is an example- lets say you are looking for a job as a COmpany Executive. Your work experience has been limited to working in restaurants as busboy- server- host- head chef. One of the requirements for your new job is supervisory skills in office management. So instead of saying-
Chef

• Trained several new recruits in the art of cuisine

It has been suggested that you now relabel this as-

Deparment manager

• Recruited and trained new hires raising department productivity.

Hhhmmmm......

Did I make the right choice when I chose to be a counselor/ therapist? I don't know.... If I knew then what I know now, would I have chosen something different? I don't know...... This is what I wish I knew four years ago. The war between social workers and counselors. Social work is a profession for those with a strong desire to help improve people’s lives. Social workers help people function the best way they can in their environment, deal with their relationships, and solve personal and family problems. Social workers often see clients who face a life-threatening disease or a social problem. These problems may include inadequate housing, unemployment, serious illness, disability, or substance abuse. Social workers also assist families that have serious domestic conflicts, including those involving child or spousal abuse.
Counseling is a process that enables a person to sort out issues and reach decisions affecting their life. Often counseling is sought out at times of change or crisis, it need not be so, however, as counseling can also help us at any time of our life. Counseling involves talking with a person in a way that helps that person solve a problem or helps to create conditions that will cause the person to understand and/or improve his behavior, character, values or life circumstances.
There is supposed to be a difference between these two professions. HOwever, it is a thin line. A thin line which has practically faded. Suddenly social workers are doing the jobs counselors are supposed to do.Both professions require a license in order to be considered professional in the fields.
There are two licenses in social work and counseling and they are considered equivalent. The LPC in counseling is a basic license which is parallel to the LSW for social workers. The advanced licenses are known as LPCC and LISW. In order for a counselor to get a license one has to have a MAster's degree in counseling. SOcial workers can get their basic license with just a Bachelor's degree and perform therapy.
WHy didn't I know this? Had I known this I would have come here to study social work. To make matters worse Ohio is a Social WOrker state. In layman's language, Ohio supports social workers especially with regard to employment and certification.
Dear God, WHy didn't I become a doctor? I loved biology. Why why why?????